IS THERAPY FOR ME?

If you are experiencing problems at the moment and can't seem to find a solution it can help to talk through what is happening. This helps empower you to seek your own solutions to making change.

There are no rules as to what you need to be experiencing to justify counselling and there are no age limits to seeking counselling. If you feel you want to talk to somebody that is neutral and away from your usual support network then counselling can be for you. If you are feeling like you are struggling, or any symptoms you experience are becoming more and more problematic to your everyday living then it is ok to ask for help.

You may have some idea of where these problems have come from but if not that’s ok. Counselling can help you to understand what may have caused them in order to move forward differently.

 

They may have been as a result of one event very early on in your life in which you have developed a maladaptive coping strategy since then that is no longer working. Or it may have stemmed from an accumulation of life events that have become overwhelming.

 

It may not have been an event but a way in which you were brought up to understand your emotions and the world which is no longer working for you.

Possible reasons for needing therapy

You may be going through or have experienced a particular event that you feel unable to cope with or recover from such as.....

  • Loss or bereavement

  • Redundancy

  • Family break-up

  • An accident

  • End of a long project such as a wedding, studying, competing etc.

  • Children leaving home

  • Yourself leaving home

  • Work  or school stress

  • Financial stress

  • Illness

  • Mortality and ageing

You may be experiencing some form of mental health problem where the cause is not always known, such as.....

  • Depression

  • Anxiety

  • Panic Attacks

  • Stress

  • Guilt

  • Anger

  • Sexual problems

  • Isolation and loneliness

  • Trauma

  • Addiction

  • Dissociation

  • Relational problems

You may be contemplating specific issues that you need a safe and neutral person to work through with such as ....

  • Gender identity

  • Sexual identity

  • Career change

  • Feeling a lost sense of  direction

  • Making a key life decision

  • Relationship change

  • Considering suicide or self harm

 

 
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Adapting to a changing world

A Brave New World

Every generation is faced with it's own new challenges particularly when faced with a rapidly available and changing world through technology and social media. 

Todays young people are having to deal with a world only known through social media which can be fast and intense and presents conflicting opinions and ideas about identity, morals and values. They are also faced with an unsettled political and environmental future, and bnot to forget a global pandemic.

Adults are having to adapt to new technolgy and a generally faster paced life. This can offer new opportunities never dreamt of before such as having a choice in new careers and jobs, travelling the world, being a more authetic self in a more accepting society around sexuality, gender and race. But increased choice can bring increased anxiety, and a more open and global means of communication can create increased vulnerability.

Adults may not have had to face and deal with new social issues and structures such as family breakdowns, redundancy, national financial instability, new technologies and more recently a global pandemic.

As an adult we think we should have it all sorted, we should know how to deal with our problems. But what we have done is find ways to cope with problems within a society we were brought up in, which until now may have worked well. Some solutions may work short-term but in the long term may not be effective in coping with the ever changing world around us. 

So, as adults, it is ok to ask for help in order to adjust to these changes. It is also now much more acceptable to say that we are not coping and to seek help. In fact, it is encouraged more and more, regardless of stigma. We no longer have to have a ‘Stiff upper lip’, even though we are masters at it.

Mental health is becoming openly encouraged to be talked about because there is an epidemic of depression, anxiety and suicide particularly amongst young people and men. This in itself is creating new issues when faced with a struggling NHS system where the only way to get help is to be in crisis. 

Getting on top of emotional difficulties is crucial in preventing anybody reaching crisis point.

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It's never too late

 

Neuro-science
Whilst it may not always feel like it our brains are not rigid and fixed into only one way of thinking. These are merely neuron structures in certain parts of our brain in which synapses have formed to create habits. Science shows that the brain has a plasticity in which these synapses can be broken and habits can be undone and new synapses reformed to something more aligned with the true sense of self. 

Young people have the capacity to make rapid changes in their thinking because their brain is not yet fully formed due to the plasticity of their brain. They are still creating new synapses which, when reinforced with continual practice, will strengthen into automatic ways of thinking.

As new habits and thus synapses are being grown, old one's (negative and unhelpful ones) eventually weaken and dissipate. As adults we still have this capacity to change our brains this way, however the connections are much stronger and harder to change, but not impossible. Therefore it is helpful to create this change where possible when young and more permeable.

In the changing world we are in adults may have no choice to accept they have to try and change some of their old habitual ways of thinking to adapt to a new society.

What do I do now?

You may have many questions and concerns about counselling that may put you off starting.

How does it work? Is counselling is the right thing for me? Will I be tied into a fixed contract I can’t get out of? 

Please don’t panic! We take things one step at a time, at your pace, and there is never any obligation to commit at any time. You have autonomy to leave as much as you do to start this process. Follow the guidelines on the Home page  and your read more about What to expect in therapy and hopefully together we can help find solutions to your problems.